Saturday, June 18, 2005

Ransom Notice

Dear Jedi and other pathetic lifeforms,

I regret to inform you that Aayla will no longer be available to post here...that is, unless the ransom requirements at the end of this letter are met.

You see, a distant relative of hers owed me quite a large sum of credits. Unfortuantely, that relative is no longer living, and seeing as the loan was quite generous, I am determined to recieve that payment somehow. So, as your blue friend was sleeping, I had some of my servants...retrieve her. Of course, I had them take her weapons first. Wouldn't want an armed Jedi running loose around my courts, now would I?

Why her? Well, she was the only relative of his that I knew the wherabouts of. Lovely thing she is, too. Don't know why I didn't discover her earlier.

If you wish to see your friend alive again, I suggest you meet my demands:

  • Do three cartwheels
  • Follow up with the chicken dance
  • Oh yes...and...100,000,000,000 credits will do just fine. I accept cash, as well as personal checks.
If you fail to complete this task by...say...Monday, Aayla will be having an interesting go-about with the rancor monster living beneath my throne room.

I apologize for any inconviniences this may cause. Have a nice day.

Oh yeah, and don't try any rescue attempts or anything like that.

Sincerely,
Jabba the Hutt

10 Comments:

Blogger General Grievous said...

Damn... *cough* I like this Jabba person *cough* seems like a nice guy *cough* *cough* too bad he bet me to capturing Aayla *cough* *cough* *cough*

5:32 PM  
Blogger j00|{z said...

*does three cartwheels*
I don't wanna be a chicken I don't wanna be a duck...
Um... wuh oh.

5:43 PM  
Blogger Jar Jar Binks said...

Eh heh... Senator Padme, can mesa have mesa next... uh... thousand years salary in advance?

4:12 AM  
Blogger flu said...

This. is. out. rageous!!!

I must get to Tatooine!

Maybe Master Yoda will be garage sale-ing on Tatooine soon. Maybe I can get him to swing by a get me.

I'll be there soon Aayla! Don't turn green!

8:39 AM  
Blogger JawaJuice said...

WILL SOMEONE NOT SAVE HER???
I mean...I would...but galactic regulations restrict us from any transactions involving potential extermination.

10:33 AM  
Blogger flu said...

On the way, Aayla!

Will confront Jabba tomorree!

3:48 PM  
Blogger Master Yoda said...

Mr. the Hutt,

Take MasterCard do you? Wait, maxed that out already, I have. What about gift certificates to the Short & Squatty Men's clothing store?

No, wait, a better idea, I have. Trade Kenobi and Young Skywalker for Secura we will. Two Jedi for the price of one! Resist a deal like that you can not! Of course, housebroken they are not, but let them sleep outside you can.

10:29 PM  
Blogger Master Yoda said...

...thinking, I was. Even if give Secura back you will not, still take Kenobi and Youngskywalker you could.

10:34 PM  
Blogger Obi Wan Kenobi said...

Its ok I'll save you *jumps in speeder* *hides fluffy pink dice*

6:12 AM  
Blogger Aayla Secura said...

Master Yoda,
Have them placed in cabonite and we'll talk.
--Jabba

9:43 AM  

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